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'I begged my mother for permission to kill myself': Bestselling author Marian Keyes opens up about her dark battle with depressionThe author has suffered from crippling depression since 2009She pulled through her darkest days with help from a therapistThe author has spoken of how baking has helped her cope
09:13 GMT, 12 April 2013
10:07 GMT, 12 April 2013
Battle: Best-selling author Marian Keyes has told how her depression drove her to beg her mother to let her kill herself in 2010
Bestselling author Marian Keyes has revealed how her crippling depression led her to beg her mother for permission to kill herself.
The Irish writer, who has sold 23 million copies of her books worldwide, has told how she bought a knife in January 2010 and intended to take her own life.
But the novelist, who is best known for books including Watermelon, Lucy Sullivan is Getting Married, and This Charming Man, was able to pull through with the help of her therapist.
In an interview with The Irish Independent's Weekend magazine, Marian said: 'I was extremely suicidal for a year and a half, and I had to fight it every day.
'I remember sobbing in my mother Mary's arms and begging her to give me permission to kill myself.'
Marian's experience is mirrored by that of a character in her most recent book The Mystery of Mercy Close, but the 39-year-old from Limerick in Ireland told the magazine that she would have happily given up writing if it would have helped rid her of her depression.
The writer has spoken frankly about her battle with depression before and how it left her unable to get out of bed for a period after a breakdown in October 2009.
She was forced to cut short a holiday with her husband and was admitted to a psychiatric hospital two months later.
Marian tried a number of different treatments, but eventually found that the only thing that helped was baking cakes.
She admitted in a 2012 interview that baking cakes had left her 'the size of a house' but that she found it 'comforting.
The bestselling author says that she has more good days than bad now and hopes that her books will help other sufferers of depression cope with the mental illness.
Struggle: The writer has spoken frankly about her battle with depression before and how it left her unable to get out of bed for a period after a breakdown in October 2009
Bestseller: Marian's dark experiences in 2010 are mirrored by a character in her most recent novel The Mystery of Mercy Close, left, and she released a charity book, Saved by Cake (right), after baking helped her cope with depression
She said: 'There are so many people who have gone through the darkness that I go through, but I feel uniquely lucky that my experiences can be diverted into a book that might strike a chord with someone in the same position.'
Miss Keyes has been considered a pioneer of the ‘chick-lit’ genre since she started writing almost 20 years ago.
Her novels feature strong female characters and dark themes such as drug abuse, alcoholism, mental illness and divorce.
After baking helped with her battle against depression, she published a guide to baking for charity, called Saved by Cake.